Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Goodbye 2013 . . .

Well 2013, honestly you kind of sucked, or at least you started out that way.

The year began very sadly, with the ending of a relationship that was overdue to be torn apart. It makes me wonder why we cling to things that are toxic and need to be released.

I also developed some really important friendships this year, and that made things better.

I have grown to know more about who I am and the path I am taking. I've learned to accept myself more as I am, and attempted to change somethings that need changing. I've grown in my revulsion against social injustice, and I am inspired by where to start to make change, but this in itself is problematic for me because I have a fixer complex.

And my heart has grown, even after having been broken (again), it is still full  of love and joy, especially in these last 3 months of the year. Someone is making my heart smile and it can't help to spread to my face. It's a strange thing to be overly stressed by finals and PhD applications and still have a perma-smile on my face.

2013 is the year I started truly finding my voice in my work. Presenting more of me and less of those who I study. I am hoping to continue this and continue school.

So goodbye 2013, all in all I suppose you ended well enough, but I am hoping that 2014 will usher in many great things. I already know it is a year of new beginnings, at the very least with graduation, and whatever comes after. I hope in 2014 to grow in trust and dependence on God, and to seek to do His will in all my endeavors. I want to be less timid, and to remember:
There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. - C.S. Lewis
But it is worth the risk, would I rather suffer a little now or suffer a lifetime of regret?

So here's to 2014, a new year, a new beginning. 

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